...at the end of the tunnel.
Tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree…we’re comin’ home. The processes are all falling into place now…and our return is imminent. Carson’s passport is not actually in hand yet…but it was scheduled to arrive by train last evening by 10p. The passport has been printed…I believe “lost in transit” may be the proper phrase to use for it’s whereabouts the last several days. Luck would have it…today is Ukrainian Independence Day. The businesses are shut down and the city is prepped for a bacchanalia. There are huge stage sets in every major square…the vendors are setting their tents. I’m certain the party will be a big one…Ukrainians do love to drink. It is legal to walk the streets with open containers…and lukewarm beers are being enjoyed by many a passerby…at all hours of the day and night. There are also a number of rural communities literally dying because of the alcohol problems. But that’s another story…
I’m certain that the city will be filled with fireworks. I don’t believe that I have mentioned in the past…but fireworks are a daily occurrence in this country. Every…single…night. I love fireworks…they are one of my favorite joys in life. However…there is no set time for when they will go off…or where they will go off. On Saturday nights in Xapkib (Kharkiv)…there were no fewer than five displays surrounding our apartment. You heard them all…but you saw very few. I’ve seen them in Kyiv several times…as well as Odessa. I’m still not certain why they set them off as often as they do…no one seems to have the answer. It seems a very expensive activity…for a country in such need…but I will enjoy watching the face of the little man when he experiences his first fireworks this evening. We rarely head out after dark…it doesn’t actually get dark here until around 10p. It’s light again by 4a. The days are extremely long here…17-18 hours. However…tonight we will share the independence of Carson’s homeland with him for what will quite probably be the last time in his life. He will be American soon…of Ukrainian descent.
The last 10 days have been such incredible joy. All of the darkness that we have suffered in this country has seemed to fall by the wayside. The world through the eyes of this child is a delight to experience. It’s like a newborn child…in a four year old’s body. Everything is new to him. He loves to eat. And…he eats just about everything. He loves vegetables. He will eat whole tomatoes and cucumbers (the cukes here are smaller than ours back home) at a time. He will sit in a restaurant…and clean his plate. He’s not always an angel during his restaurant visits…but he’s learning. Dede definitely has her hands full…but she handles him very well. He loves to test the waters…and with the language barrier…it’s that much more difficult. However…she’s jumped into motherhood with all barrels loaded…and she wears the role beautifully. I couldn’t do it.
He’s learning English…and we are trying to transition away from the Russian phrases that we use with him. It’s unbelievably surprising to me how much of what we say that he actually understands. A Russian lady that sat next to us at a restaurant for lunch yesterday was amazed at him. We had talked with her for a little while…she had worked with the adoption process at one time. She understood the situation with him completely. When Dede asked him if his food was too hot…he shook his head “no”. When she asked him if it was good…he shook his head “yes.“ The woman leaned over and smiled with surprise that he got it. I’m telling you…this kid is brilliant. He‘s also a brilliant manipulator. I cannot for the love of me figure out how he learned some of his tricks…but he’s got a few. I’m certain that none of them worked on the Drill Sergeants at the orphanage…but he’s got some moves. When he’s done something that he’s not supposed to do…and he knows it…and he gets caught…he looks over…smiles…then comes to hug on you and give you a kiss. It’s really cute…but you’re still not playing with that electrical outlet Carson…it’s dangerous honey. He does this to Dede the most…she’s usually the one telling him “no.” Welllllllll…he’s her kid…I’m just Aunt Kelly…and with me…if it doesn’t hurt him…he’s probably gettin’ away with it…we’re buddies. Okay…so I’m not that bad…I make him behave…but I do usually leave the discipline to his mama. Like I said…he’s her kid. ; )
He visited the beach yesterday for the first time. We took the subway over (not his first trip…he’s subway savvy)…and he loved it. We swam in the Dnipro River…along with thousands of other Ukrainians. For a Wednesday…the place was packed. He’s taken to the water like a fish on holiday. He’s not at all afraid of going under…loves it actually. He jumps in the air and falls down into the water…and sinks below the surface…only to be snatched up by his mama or I with a face full of water…and laughter that makes your heart sing. He drank a few pints of that river too I’m afraid…but never bothered him for a second. He’d brush himself off…and take another flying leap. Water wings are certainly in this kid’s very near future. Little Kelley’s a waterbug too…she can show him the ropes.
As for now…we are preparing for the journey home. We leave Kyiv at 8:10p on Tuesday night arriving in Paris at 10:30p. We have a layover for the night…with a 9:20a flight on Wednesday morning. I have booked a room…but will try to figure out a way to take a late night trip into the city so Dede can at least see a few sights. Paris IS the “city of lights”…and at night is spectacular. She has talked about Paris for much of our stay here…and to at least take a ride down the Champs-Elycees…and to see the Eiffel Tower with all it’s strobes…would be warming for her soul I’m sure. We’ll see what we can do.
On Wednesday afternoon we arrive in Birmingham at around 4:30p. Of course…we are flying Delta (Don’t Ever Leave The Airport)…through Atlanta I might add…so we will cross our fingers that we are there on time. Our layover in Atlanta is about 3.5 hours…so that should be plenty of time to cover any faux pas. The one thing that has kept me going through much of this excruciating process…is imagining the look on the faces of family and friends back home when they lay eyes on this angel for the first time. The tears of joy that I’m certain will be shed when you hear him giggle…watch him strut…and listen to him carry on an entire conversation with you in Russian. He has a bit of a lisp (in the back of his mouth…not the front)…and Russian has lots of sh…ch…and zh sounds…it’s precious to hear him talk.
As for Dede and I…well…we can taste the Davenport’s pizza…Surin Tokyo rolls…and the Dreamland ribs we’re going to munch out on while watching the Tide take to the field for the first time this season. These are actually extra special to me…as I live in Colorado…have been out of the country since January…and have not been to Alabama since last summer. I’m really salivating for my faves. For me though…first on the menu is a Milo’s double cheeseburger. The sloppier…the better. All we’ve done is eat for 9 weeks…but it’s all we think about back in the U.S. of A. too. Okay…well…we do think about seeing all of you…really…we do…while sitting over a Davenport’s pizza…of course. ; )
I am continuing to take pictures…but will only post a few more before we return home. I will continue to take pics of the trip home…and will post those upon our return. You may not hear from me again before our return unless something crazy happens…but I will update back in the states. There are many more stories to tell than I have had the opportunity to post…but those will be told in time…over pizzas…sushi…a bottle of red wine perhaps. This adventure is still in the embryonic stages. Dede…cheers to you my friend…I love him as much as I’ve ever loved another human being…but honey…you’ve got your hands full. I will raise my glass to you again and again…for the sleepless nights…the exhausted days…the exhilarations and the heartaches. But more than anything…I thank you…for bringing this little man into my life…and for giving him the gift of life. It is as admirable an endeavor as I have ever witnessed. Cheers to you!!!
Das vadanya....
Peace...
Friday, August 24, 2007
Friday, August 17, 2007
Oh what a beautiful child!!!!
The town of Losova, Ukraine is a small one. When you imagine soviet Russia…it is this town. The buildings are stark…timeworn…unpretentious. Small farms border the city on all sides…a patchwork of small plots of land sowed and reaped for years by the inhabitants of the small towns that are much the fabric of rural Ukraine. (Notwithstanding the years of Stalin‘s “collective farming” in the now defunct Soviet Union). There are no stoplights in the town…no benches in the city park. There are memorials…as are everywhere…of soviet times…soldiers of wars won…and lost. We find our seats on a nearby curb…as we wait for the government to generate new birth rights to a once lost child. His name has been officially changed now…he will be American soon. We still call him Danya…I’m not certain how the transition will be made. I tell his mother that he will always be ‘Danya’ to me. “That’s okay” I am told. My “pet name” perhaps for a child that will hold the largest place in my heart of anyone I’ve encountered in life thus far. He will forever remind me of the year I spent one summer in the country of his birth.
He is dressed in a pair of cacky “Spyder” shorts and a red…gray…and white striped hooded shirt as he walks down the hallway of the orphanage for the last time. He is solemn…as is always his demeanor when surrounded by authority. Uncertainty in his face as his caretakers…the only family he has ever known…say “paka” for the last time. This place will be a distant memory in his young mind soon…a place forgotten in time. His friends will continue to parade around in their underwear on hot summer days…playing with broken toys…soiled dolls…and conversing with each other in the soon to be forgotten dialect of his homeland.
We pile into the back of the taxi…Danya on his mother’s lap…staring out the window at a world he has never seen. There are several stops to be made before he is alone with us for the first time…before he is free. The application for his passport takes us to several government buildings…finally the local police station for photos and signatures. A storm has blown in as we run back to the taxi for the final leg of his trip to freedom. The streets flood here with the lightest of showers…this day a river runs through the center of Xapkib (Kharkiv) as Dede nearly takes a spill…her new son in her arms. Someone is watching down upon her as she narrowly escapes disaster.
Curiosity is the event of the evening as Danya is let loose to explore his new surroundings. First act on the playbill is a hot bath. Wow…what a show!! Excited does not begin to describe the emotion of this young boy as he splashes around the bathtub this first night…and…well…every night since. I believe it is his favorite time of the day. The parks…fountains…new friends…all great…but bath time is his biggest thrill. He flops around like a fish out of water…giggles…designs elaborate sculptures in his hair…and is not afraid for one second to dunk his head completely under water…only to come up giggling yet again. Brushing his teeth…now that’s another issue…but he’s getting there. At least the faces he makes while the minty freshness of the toothpaste explodes in his mouth are priceless.
We manage to settle him down long enough to cut the “mullet” that they find so stylish on this side of the globe out of his hair. I’m certain that there are still people in our country who find this haircut fashionable…I’m here to tell you…it’s not! Actually…it was quite cute on him…as anything would be cute on such a beautiful child. However…we both sighed with relief…as the hair hit the kitchen floor. It’s so much cuter now.
He bounced back and forth from their room to my room…jumping across the bed…the sofa…dumping Legos…hiding in closets. His first meal was a concoction of chicken noodle soup that I created using Knorr Swiss soup mix and ramen noodles. It wasn’t half bad…Dede and I ate the same. That with a few saltines and several chunks of cheese…he was a happy boy. Oh yes…and there were a few little morsels of junk food thrown in for a first night treat. However…since there’s a nutritionist in the family…we’ll keep that part under raps… ; ) (ss).
Sleep didn’t necessarily come easy that first night…but there were never any tears. Too much excitement to actually lay down and close his eyes. Once settled in however…the zz’s began to flow. We had to be up bright and early for a 7am train to Kyiv…another adventure in itself…another blog.
I apologize for not posting sooner…but all of you parents out there know how busy a 4-year old can keep you. I wanted you to know that he is safely with his mama…and we are all having the time of our lives. I am downloading the 724 (I can't stop myself) pictures that I have snapped the last several days…and I will post some new ones over the weekend as well as a new story or two. We are waiting now on his passport which we hope to have by the end of next week…then it’s off to the American embassy for his visa. Some time in between he has to see a doctor for an exam in order to get his visa. The rest of the time is spent playing in the park…the fountain…on the playground…a trip down the river on a boat…and on…and on…. All new experiences to him. All a joy to experience with him. I will tell all…when I have time…and energy… : )
Love and peace to all back home…we soooo hope to see you soon. It will never however…be soon enough…
Das vadanya…
Your humble host...
The Bloggin' Nomad
He is dressed in a pair of cacky “Spyder” shorts and a red…gray…and white striped hooded shirt as he walks down the hallway of the orphanage for the last time. He is solemn…as is always his demeanor when surrounded by authority. Uncertainty in his face as his caretakers…the only family he has ever known…say “paka” for the last time. This place will be a distant memory in his young mind soon…a place forgotten in time. His friends will continue to parade around in their underwear on hot summer days…playing with broken toys…soiled dolls…and conversing with each other in the soon to be forgotten dialect of his homeland.
We pile into the back of the taxi…Danya on his mother’s lap…staring out the window at a world he has never seen. There are several stops to be made before he is alone with us for the first time…before he is free. The application for his passport takes us to several government buildings…finally the local police station for photos and signatures. A storm has blown in as we run back to the taxi for the final leg of his trip to freedom. The streets flood here with the lightest of showers…this day a river runs through the center of Xapkib (Kharkiv) as Dede nearly takes a spill…her new son in her arms. Someone is watching down upon her as she narrowly escapes disaster.
Curiosity is the event of the evening as Danya is let loose to explore his new surroundings. First act on the playbill is a hot bath. Wow…what a show!! Excited does not begin to describe the emotion of this young boy as he splashes around the bathtub this first night…and…well…every night since. I believe it is his favorite time of the day. The parks…fountains…new friends…all great…but bath time is his biggest thrill. He flops around like a fish out of water…giggles…designs elaborate sculptures in his hair…and is not afraid for one second to dunk his head completely under water…only to come up giggling yet again. Brushing his teeth…now that’s another issue…but he’s getting there. At least the faces he makes while the minty freshness of the toothpaste explodes in his mouth are priceless.
We manage to settle him down long enough to cut the “mullet” that they find so stylish on this side of the globe out of his hair. I’m certain that there are still people in our country who find this haircut fashionable…I’m here to tell you…it’s not! Actually…it was quite cute on him…as anything would be cute on such a beautiful child. However…we both sighed with relief…as the hair hit the kitchen floor. It’s so much cuter now.
He bounced back and forth from their room to my room…jumping across the bed…the sofa…dumping Legos…hiding in closets. His first meal was a concoction of chicken noodle soup that I created using Knorr Swiss soup mix and ramen noodles. It wasn’t half bad…Dede and I ate the same. That with a few saltines and several chunks of cheese…he was a happy boy. Oh yes…and there were a few little morsels of junk food thrown in for a first night treat. However…since there’s a nutritionist in the family…we’ll keep that part under raps… ; ) (ss).
Sleep didn’t necessarily come easy that first night…but there were never any tears. Too much excitement to actually lay down and close his eyes. Once settled in however…the zz’s began to flow. We had to be up bright and early for a 7am train to Kyiv…another adventure in itself…another blog.
I apologize for not posting sooner…but all of you parents out there know how busy a 4-year old can keep you. I wanted you to know that he is safely with his mama…and we are all having the time of our lives. I am downloading the 724 (I can't stop myself) pictures that I have snapped the last several days…and I will post some new ones over the weekend as well as a new story or two. We are waiting now on his passport which we hope to have by the end of next week…then it’s off to the American embassy for his visa. Some time in between he has to see a doctor for an exam in order to get his visa. The rest of the time is spent playing in the park…the fountain…on the playground…a trip down the river on a boat…and on…and on…. All new experiences to him. All a joy to experience with him. I will tell all…when I have time…and energy… : )
Love and peace to all back home…we soooo hope to see you soon. It will never however…be soon enough…
Das vadanya…
Your humble host...
The Bloggin' Nomad
Thursday, August 9, 2007
From the heart...
Thanks!I usually leave all the blog postings to Kelly (we all know why!!)....but today is my turn. It won't be written as eloquently as her blogs...but this is from the heart, so here goes..I want to thank each and everyone of you for all your thoughts and prayers. I am so very blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful family, coworkers and friends (one in the same). The phone calls, e-mails and comments on the blog have kept me going throughout this long and difficult process. The thought of stepping off that plane and being back home brings tears to my eyes...Then again, tears come easily to me these days. The endless sight of little old ladies with their cups in hand begging for change..all the other kids in Carson's orphanage who won't be adopted..and last but not least all the homeless animals that roam the streets. I will never forget this place nor it's people and all the struggles they face on a daily basis..
A special thank you is in order for Dr. K. Conaty. He and I had a conversation while working together in MRI one day, over 2 1/2 years ago... I remember that day well .He told me about adopting his daughters from the Ukraine and that he was a facilitator for families that wished to adopt from that country. Little did I know it would take this long, nor that I would stay in this country for nearly 7 weeks to get my child..but I have to say that every time I see Carson...the wait has been well worth it. Dr Conaty did give me fair warning about the trials and tribulations of adopting from the Ukraine...so I kind of had an idea about what I was getting into when I accepted this adventure... I will forever be grateful for all your support not only since my arrival here but for all the paper work and e-mails you had to walk me through to get to this point. I am so thankful and I already love your daughters...not only for translating for me but for the great help they will be to Carson in his transition to a whole new world. From the bottom of my heart...Thank you
So many things in my life that seemed so important before.... just aren't anymore. I see things so differently now..through the eyes of my son. He is the most precious thing in the world and will forever be my best friend.. I only hope that I can be half the parent to him that my parents are to me..I'm the luckiest daughter in the world..I thank God daily for the journey of my life because after 45 years I finally know what my purpose is...to be the best mother I can be to Carson and to give him the opportunity to have a wonderful life.
I mention Kelly Wilson last only because words do not come so easily for someone that has given up so much to be here with me. How do you thank someone for giving up 7-8 weeks of their life to be in a 3rd world country (with no a/c, not many smiling faces to see, barely anyone speaks English, not to mention we are stared at on a daily basis)... so I could make it through this place...I will forever be grateful and know that God worked things out how they should be. I will always have this blog to share with Carson so that he will know the true experience, and the lengths we went through to get him to America, what a better way to show him than through her words and photography..
I am not certain when I will return home with my son. The process is ongoing. I look forward to thanking each of you personally..but for now..from the bottom of my heart.. Thank you…
The last thing I will say is..the one person that I wish could meet my incredible son the most, would be my brother Randy...but I know he is smiling from above......
Always, Dede
A special thank you is in order for Dr. K. Conaty. He and I had a conversation while working together in MRI one day, over 2 1/2 years ago... I remember that day well .He told me about adopting his daughters from the Ukraine and that he was a facilitator for families that wished to adopt from that country. Little did I know it would take this long, nor that I would stay in this country for nearly 7 weeks to get my child..but I have to say that every time I see Carson...the wait has been well worth it. Dr Conaty did give me fair warning about the trials and tribulations of adopting from the Ukraine...so I kind of had an idea about what I was getting into when I accepted this adventure... I will forever be grateful for all your support not only since my arrival here but for all the paper work and e-mails you had to walk me through to get to this point. I am so thankful and I already love your daughters...not only for translating for me but for the great help they will be to Carson in his transition to a whole new world. From the bottom of my heart...Thank you
So many things in my life that seemed so important before.... just aren't anymore. I see things so differently now..through the eyes of my son. He is the most precious thing in the world and will forever be my best friend.. I only hope that I can be half the parent to him that my parents are to me..I'm the luckiest daughter in the world..I thank God daily for the journey of my life because after 45 years I finally know what my purpose is...to be the best mother I can be to Carson and to give him the opportunity to have a wonderful life.
I mention Kelly Wilson last only because words do not come so easily for someone that has given up so much to be here with me. How do you thank someone for giving up 7-8 weeks of their life to be in a 3rd world country (with no a/c, not many smiling faces to see, barely anyone speaks English, not to mention we are stared at on a daily basis)... so I could make it through this place...I will forever be grateful and know that God worked things out how they should be. I will always have this blog to share with Carson so that he will know the true experience, and the lengths we went through to get him to America, what a better way to show him than through her words and photography..
I am not certain when I will return home with my son. The process is ongoing. I look forward to thanking each of you personally..but for now..from the bottom of my heart.. Thank you…
The last thing I will say is..the one person that I wish could meet my incredible son the most, would be my brother Randy...but I know he is smiling from above......
Always, Dede
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